Naming Strategy: How to Choose a Brand Name That Scales Globally (Without Getting Sued or Sounding Dumb)
Few things strike more fear into a CMO’s heart than the words:
“We need a new name.”
Because everyone suddenly becomes an expert.
Your CEO wants something “short and powerful.”
Legal wants something “defensible.”
Your creative team wants something “playful.”
And your audience? They just want to be able to pronounce it.
Welcome to naming — the dark art of saying everything in one word, and saying it in a way that no one else has (yet).
Step 1: Know What You’re Naming (Seriously)
Obvious, right? You’d be shocked how many brands skip this part.
Before you brainstorm, define what the name needs to do.
Is it launching a company, a product, or a platform?
Should it sound trustworthy, disruptive, elegant, technical?
A great name is a strategic tool, not a Scrabble accident.
It should carry your positioning in its DNA — not just sound “cool.”
Don’t start with phonetics. Start with purpose.
Step 2: Pick Your Naming Personality
Names come in archetypes.
Here’s the cheat sheet for your brand’s identity crisis:
Descriptive: Tell people what it is (General Motors, PayPal).
Invented: Create a new word (Verizon, Oreo, Zillow).
Metaphorical: Evoke an idea or feeling (Nike, Amazon, TheorySF 👀).
Founder-based: Name it after a person (Ford, Ben & Jerry’s).
Acronymic: Say too many words faster (IBM, GE, BMW).
Each path has tradeoffs.
Descriptive is clear but hard to trademark.
Invented is unique but hard to remember.
Metaphorical? That’s where poetry meets precision — and where great brand stories are born.
Step 3: Think Global, Not Local
A name that kills in Kansas might die in Kyoto.
Before you fall in love, do the homework:
Does it translate cleanly across key markets?
Does it mean something embarrassing in another language?
Can people pronounce it in more than one country without summoning demons?
Global scale means cross-cultural fluency.
Your name doesn’t need to sound universal — it needs to feel inevitable.
If your brand name needs an apology in your launch video, start over.
Step 4: Make It Easy to Find (and Hard to Imitate)
This is where art meets algorithm.
Before you finalize anything, test for:
Trademark availability (good luck).
Domain + social handle availability (double good luck).
Searchability: Can you actually own Page 1 for it?
A brilliant name no one can Google might as well not exist.
And a generic name everyone can own? Welcome to SEO purgatory.
The best brand names are rare words with rich meaning — not common words with creative spelling.
Step 5: Test the “Bar Test”
If someone hears your name once at a bar and forgets it by the Uber ride home, it’s not a good name.
Your name should:
Stick after one mention.
Look good on a screen and a sneaker.
Be flexible enough to scale into sub-brands, products, and new markets.
Longevity beats novelty every time.
If it only works as a pun, it’s not a brand name — it’s a dad joke.
Step 6: Get Emotional Before You Get Legal
The best names don’t just sound right — they feel inevitable.
They evoke a reaction. Curiosity. Admiration. Maybe even jealousy.
The goal isn’t to name what your product does.
It’s to name what your audience will feel when it works.
Great names build futures, not describe features.
Final Thought
Naming isn’t wordplay — it’s world-building.
It’s the foundation for how your story gets told, sold, and remembered.
At TheorySF, we’ve named everything from global tech platforms to premium wellness products to ergonomic pillows (don’t ask).
And we’ve learned that every name worth owning comes from one thing: clarity of meaning.
Need a name that travels well and tells the truth?
Let’s name something unignorable →
